What is ‘co-regulation’?

Children are born with many emotions but without the language or ability to understand and manage them. We teach them how to be calm by doing it with them: rocking, patting, hugging, and quiet talking.

Children have good days and bad days when managing their feelings – just like the rest of us. They are sensitive to stress, lack of sleep, noise, arguments, etc.  This can make paying attention to teachers and parents very difficult at times.

When a calm adult helps a child to stay calm and provides support for the child’s emotional experiences, they become ‘in tune’ with each other. Being ‘in tune’ is important because children need to learn to co-regulate their emotions (manage their emotions with their parents help) before they can self-regulate (manage their emotions without help).

Here are a couple of suggestions of Apps families have found helpful, or you may like to search for something similar.

Breathe, Think, Do with Sesame Street (free app). This app provides breathing and problem solving practice for children.

Settle Your Glitter by Momentous Institute (free app). This app guides children through deep breathing exercises that allow them to regain control of emotions.

Activity: Feelings Chart

You may like to print out the attached feelings chart and use the template to brainstorm with your child:

• What signs they show on the outside to reflect how they feel on the inside?
• What activity or strategy they could use to help them to feel calmer?
• What activity or strategy could others use to help them to feel calmer?

Tip: Keep it on your fridge to use as a daily reference for how to manage big feelings